She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
