Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
home. puking in laundry basket.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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