I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
