I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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