Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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