what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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