tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
