Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
