i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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