hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
