I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
