i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
