he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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