I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize