he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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