How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Randomize
