She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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