come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
