Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize