the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
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