Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
