Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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