I just made out with a guy for $7.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
