No, you can still breathe under the balls.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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