can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
is that a dick in a sweater?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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