just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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