You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Randomize
