The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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