She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
