We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
