This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
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