the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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