yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
