Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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