i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
