hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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