who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
