One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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