Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
