I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize