the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
