I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
