I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
