from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
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