How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
