it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
