At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
