Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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