Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize