remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Randomize
