What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I'm sobbing to NWA
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
