to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
