Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize